Pain tolerance is a funny thing. What’s earth shattering to one is merely irritating to another. But let’s be clear—we’re not talking kidney stone, tooth abscess, child birth, or nerve kind of pain. Those are legit, stop you in your tracks, can’t “psych yourself out of” pain. If you feel “OUCH” or “insert multiple expletives here” or pretty much anything that registers on the McGill Pain Index, that’s outside of the scope of the memes and following discussion.
It's not a contest, but...I was "fortunate" enough to appreciate my husband's recent kidney stone passing; looking like a solid #10, possibly #11 on the scale below.
From a more positive "fitness lifestyle mindset" perspective, we're talking about pain of being uncomfortable. Specifically, the discomfort of exercise. Depending on your personality and fitness experience, it ranges from “Ugh, I don’t feel like it” to “This is kinda hard” to “Dear sweet heavens, when will this end?” The real barriers aren’t just physical; they’re mental. And those are the ones we need to tackle first and head-on. Especially beginners needing a harder nudge to overcome inertia's coziness.
Let's first explore the different degrees experienced in the discomfort territory:
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Mild irritation: “This is so annoying. I really should book that dental cleaning.”
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Challenge: “Whoa, this is downright unpleasant. Who swapped out my weights for heavier ones??? How many more minutes/reps/sets do I have to do?"
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Serious grit: "I’m ready for this to be over, like, yesterday. Who invented this? And why am I still doing it?"
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Fight for survival: "This is officially terrible. Sweet merciful kettlebells, make it stop!"
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And for drama queens (or uber experienced trainees) with the need to escalate:
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The spice of suffering: "I can actually hear my muscles questioning my life choices. And honestly, they have a point. Isn't there such a thing as too strong?"
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Full existential crisis mode: "If I make it out alive, I'm absolutely writing my will. Someone tell my cat I love them."
Inspired by Allie's super useful pain scale, here's what discomfort can look on student faces.
Good news: most people will make impressive progress between challenge and serious grit. Maybe tasting a fight for survival once in a while after building a good foundation. FYI, Bulgarian (rear-foot elevated) split squats—they start at wanting them over and get worse. Seriously though, discomfort lies within a continuum and overcoming difficulty is necessary for improvement. But at no time should you need an ER. The key is knowing when to push and when to back off—progress comes from smart effort, not mindless suffering.
If you're the type whose discomfort triggers pretty quickly—Sweat: ew! Breathing hard: oh I hate this. Heart rate pumping: am I dying? Muscles straining: I'm literally breaking—it's ok. It doesn't make you a bad person. In fact, it tells me that you have oodles of potential for improvement; more than an already fit person! You'll actually get more health and lifespan benefits just going from way below average to about average.
But maybe even deeper hitting and often unspoken discomforts stops you from getting into the physical territory:
These and other "reasons" like "I tried that before, it didn't work" and "I have XYZ ailment" are powerful mental roadblocks holding you back. Unfortunately, our bodies don't get stronger from good intentions or wait, preserved, for us to "mentally get there." The best time to start getting fitter was 20, 30, 40 years ago. The next best time? That's now. Acknowledge the discomfort but do it anyway.
Overcoming physical discomfort
Getting stronger and fitter needs challenge beyond the comfortable. Without it, there's no adaptation stimulus. No reason to build new muscle, strengthen tendons, nerve impulses or bones, get more efficient at mobilizing fuels for energy, etc. Progressively pushing—or nudging—our boundaries into or through today's discomfort is everyone's key to boosting our resilience.
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Master basic, foundational movements first. Before you swing or deadlift, you need to learn how to plank and hinge.
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Focus on improvement, not perfection. Going from 5 to 10 minutes of exercise, or from 10 to 20 squats is 100% improvement. From zero, everything starts with one.
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Increase duration or frequency gradually (e.g., from 15 to 20 minutes or from 2x to 3x per week).
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Progressively
add challenge:
- Hold positions longer
- Do an extra rep or set
- Add resistance (weight)
- Try a harder variation (but don’t get wild)
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Hire a trainer if possible to help you work smarter, not just harder, especially as you start.
Overcoming mental discomfort
1. eat the frog first
If exercise feels like a chore, get it done early before excuses pile up. Morning workouts are great—before emails, errands, and that one friend who always invites you to brunch get in the way. Or schedule them as early as you can—getting home from a work or a school run.
My week's training goal includes a longer Zone 2 bike ride. Thanks to a solid Spotify playlist and heart rate monitor game, I’ve built up to 50-60 minutes. Physically, it’s fine. Mentally, it starts to near existential crisis mode. I'd way rather be lifting weights for an hour. So I eat this frog first thing in my training week which starts on a Sunday—no work or school conflicts.
TIP: If you have two frogs to get through, eat the biggest one first.
2. Gamify your training
Some people need a little friendly competition—even if it’s just with themselves.
- Check off completed training sessions.
- Set mini-goals like “50 squats," "12 press sets," "300 swings" this week.
- Use an app that rewards consistency (because stickers work at any age).
3. Reward the habit
Give yourself gold stars, but make them useful.
- Hit 12 workouts in a month? Buy new training leggings, a gym top, or a fresh pen for your workout log (because, hey, I love pens).
- The best rewards are things you want to use in your training—so they push you further.
4. Find an accountability buddy
A simple morning text—“Did you lift yet?” or "How long was your walk?"—can be a game changer. Even having a family member remind you to get your workout clothes ready or water bottled filled the night before is awesome.
- Friendly competition works too: “I did four workouts this week. You?”
- Share training plans and journals.
- Even better: Train together if possible.
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Start small: 10 minutes is better than 0.
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Pick one movement you enjoy.
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Focus on consistency, not intensity.
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50% time on strength, 50% on Zone 2 cardio (if all you have is one hour, that's 30 minutes each)
Non-exercisers face extra hurdles in overcoming inertia. But you have two choices:
Any movement is progress. Within a few months of consistent action, you’ll be amazed at how much less "efforty" everything feels—what used to feel like a fight for survival is now only mildly irritating or possibly even fun—for your new, stronger & fitter self.
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Perfect!!! I designed my 90 minute Before the Iron workshop to help students accelerate their kettlebell skills learning with everything you need to know BEFORE picking up the kettlebell. These same foundational principles happen to work as a great prep for all resistance training you'll want to do to become a newer, stronger and fitter you! 
Let mental discomfort keep you from getting anywhere. (Spoiler: you're threshold will always stay low.)
Make friends with discomfort—start by saying hi—and watch everything shift.
